Have you built a wall of protection?
There are times in life when you may find it necessary to build a fortress around your heart (a.k.a. your psyche) to provide a sanctuary for your feelings. Self preservation is our number one primal instinct, and we will stop at almost nothing in order to protect ourselves. Whether you apply this to hiding your vitiligo, or to avoiding potential relationships because of your vitiligo, the results are the same; the wall keeps out the potential hurt, but it also stops the inflow of experiencing many wonderful moments in life.
“The unexamined life is not worth living.” Socrates
Have you built a wall of protection? Do you feel that it could be limiting your life experiences? If you are ready to make a change, it really is as simple as making up your mind to do so. But, some of us can’t just switch gears that easily. We need to understand the process of what brought us to this point before we can let go. And you need to be patient with yourself because melting the mortar of the wall you’ve constructed takes time; time to analyze why you built the foundation, time to ponder what factors motivated you to lay each brick, and time to decide if the benefits of taking down the wall outweigh the drawbacks.
What? There are drawbacks to letting down the wall? You bet there are. You could get deeply hurt again. You could feel insecure without your protective sanctuary. In certain situations, you may even feel as though you’re not the one in control. Ouch! Those sound awful enough to make me want to keep packing on those bricks to thicken my wall. However, as terrifying as those potential drawbacks may sound, the perks you will get from knocking down the wall are a certainty.
This is the part you’ve been waiting for, the benefits: freedom, hopefulness, and passion.
- Each time you are open about your vitiligo, you will feel a sense of freedom and you’re self-esteem will empower you. It’s perfectly fine to use cosmetics to blend the white patches in order to give your skin an even tone, but leave the shame behind. And talk about your skin condition…it’s a great opportunity to educate others and reinforce the fact that it is a part of you, it doesn’t define you.
- Hopeful to feel like you fit in. Hopeful to meet someone with whom you connect. Hopeful to find a job that is fulfilling. The protective wall does not allow you to take the leap of faith necessary to enjoy these. It doesn’t allow you to be hopeful because you are filled with pessimism. Once you drop the wall though, opportunities will present themselves; allowing hopefulness and satisfaction to fill your life.
- Passion is my favorite benefit. Whether it is passion in my career, or in my private life, the exhilaration cannot be matched. It fills me with joy, energy, pride, and comfort. Who wouldn’t want that? Well, each day that your wall is standing tall, you are setting limits on experiencing passion. Drop the wall and luxuriate in your passions.
If you are ready to knock down your wall and experience all that life has to offer, start today. Analyze why you built the foundation, ponder what factors motivated you to lay each brick, and decide if the benefits of taking down the wall outweigh the drawbacks. It wasn’t a fast process for me. As a matter of fact, it took a lot of mulling until one day I heard a song at the end of a movie, and everything just clicked into place. It can happen for you, too!